How many are fixing Thanksgiving Dinner? How long did it take to prepare for it? How long did you take looking up the right receipts? How long did you work at making sure the table and setting was just perfect? How many hours did you spend cleaning, inside, outside maybe even your car if it was going to be used to pick up some guests? Even if you have it all down to a science, it still took a long time to prepare Thanksgiving Dinner, if you are the lucky one fixing and hosting.
I have fixed Thanksgiving Dinner for two to 30! And what amazed me the first time I fixed it, was how long it took to eat it.... 20 minutes… just like any other meal! Then - boom - men back to the game.... boom - children are flying past you to get outside (weather permitting or maybe not) or back to their toys... and shhhh ... whisper boom - the teens sneak upstairs or wherever they can sleek off go to do some naughty thing besides clear the table! That leaves the tired women to sit at the table, slowly grazing and chatting while dreading putting things away and cleaning up WWIII mess in the kitchen!
I know, not all the women sitting around the table helped as much as the hostess did with the meal... maybe one sweet soul helped you an hour or so before the meal was served. (I am not downplaying this extra pair of knowledgeable, helping hands – they are needed and more when it comes to putting down a dozen dishes quickly so they at least serve warm!)
Depending on the size of the crowd eating the turkey (and how many left overs you want), the turkey must be prepared the night before and tucked into the overstuffed fridge with all the other prepped food. But they all have been working hard all day too! If they have children, their day started Thanksgiving's Eve too, with baths, bushing hair and teeth, tucking into bed a couple of times and laying out of the clothes for the big day. Then it's up w-a-y before anyone else to get your ownself ready, then wake everyone, dress and rush out the door for early morning breakfast with some well rested, early riser in law. Kids are fidgety in their ‘you can’t take that off or get anything on it’ clothes and a bit grumpy, since probably a cousin or two stayed overnight and they decided to see who could stay up the longest! Of course here you sit in a warm restaurant - fighting to act interested in chit chat silently screaming to your eyelids to stay UP! Before you know it, someone announces it's time to go.... and off you all dash away – packing in and strapping up - and fighting with the car seat age angles - while all along you try to keep your cool...but loose it when your husband who is strapped in himself, mini van running and looks back at you and asks smugly, “Why do you gotta have all the doors open it's cold outside?” (As you sweat buckets, your winter coat tossed on your seat in front... that's why your door is open too, opps.) Awkwardly, your eyes meet and a chill runs up his spine and suddenly he becomes super, helpful husband!!!
This senerio plays out for lunch too and now here you are nodding off at the dinner table, woken up by male tone cheers in the other room over some stupid game where men are paid a fortune to fight over chalk lines on a football field!
Oh…. But I am writing this to help you have a stress-reduced Thanksgiving… Christmas… etc!
#1. Decide early… what is best for your family… stay at home and invite guests to your home, or not. Even if you would rather ‘not’, we can still cut down on the stress described above!!!
#2. If you have selected ‘Not’ in #1… then make your wishes known early (months early and repeat several times throughout the year) that this year you are going to have one Thanksgiving meal a day! Thanksgiving runs from Thursday to Sunday…. Spread the love!!!! No one enjoys that overstuffed feeling of eating ‘some of everything’ at every get-together so you don’t offend someone!!!!!! Even offer to bring a dish or two, maybe bring wine, pop… gee, Kool-Aide for the kids and the grownups that use it as a mixer!!
#2 - A - If you plan to dress your kids to the hilt so they look good for the friends and family pictures…. I’ve been there and done that. But bring them some clothes to change into, because all they are thinking is when can I get away from all this boring, grown-up talking and go play with my cousins!! You make your kids take off their ‘school clothes’ when they come home from school before they start to rough house, right???
NOTE To Grandparents and Childless Others who invite families to their homes… Maybe it’s a good idea to help your son or daughter host the dinner. Even offer to spend the night so you can help cook and or watch the kids. Your home is probably far from childproof! And all the kids usual distractions like games, toys and friends are at their house… not yours!
#3. To the Host/Hostess:
A – Deep Breath. It's going to be ok. It's just a meal!!
B – Plan out what you want to eat. You don’t need a million items! What do you make best? Simple – make that!
C – Delegate the rest of the meal out! My mother-in-law was the best pie maker, my sister-in-law made a salad that was a meal in itself, and my brother-in-law knew wine and stronger drinks better than of all of us.
D – Keep delegating! Don’t waste your precious time carving the bird… have someone else do the job, who cares if it’s not in perfect slices, turkeys are so tender they just pull apart easily and lay nicely on a platter, add a touch of garnish, or a bigger piece of meat (that no one will probably take) like a leg or wing! Have the dishes brought to the table by several adults or teens, so everything is served quickly and hot! Or, try buffet style, that can be fun too!
E - Make clean-up easier, use throw away oven ready, foil pans whenever possible for of course the turkey, but also for the casseroles. Use aluminum foiled cookie sheets for the bread/rolls. Use nice Thanksgiving napkins and heavy paper plates, if not for dinner, at least for desert! Have already clean and ready to fill disposable, plastic bowls for left overs for you and your guests! (I also use freezer, zip-lock quart and gallon baggies!)
#4. Be Thankful! Have fun! Create some new traditions and games. Enjoy your guests! Thanksgiving is about more than just the food!!! It’s about Black Friday (!!), that’s only a few hours away!!!!
